Archive for May 26th, 2009

No surprise, but still disappointing

Tuesday, May 26th, 2009

The California Supreme Court has upheld Proposition 8, the California ballot proposition that denied some of the most basic human rights to LGBT people. Gay or lesbian couples who were married when it was legal will remain married. This ruling isn’t much of a surprise – court-watchers had pretty well predicted this was going to be the outcome – but it still, quite frankly, sucks. Sucks hard.

What sucks for me personally in this, as a Christian, is seeing my brothers and sisters in Christ applauding such decisions and standing in the way of basic human rights. Even if they accept what is, in my opinion, a rather piss-poor Biblical case that same-sex sexual acts are sinful, the fact is that Christianity is not, and should not be, the law in this country. The fact that their narrow interpretation of the Christian text says that homosexuality is wrong should not make it law. The fact that they personally can’t get past bigotry shouldn’t mean that others are denied their rights.

I will say it openly and without hesitation: Anyone claiming to be a Christian who stands against basic human rights for gay men and lesbians is in sin, and needs to repent. Even if they believe (wrongly) that homosexuality is sinful, that is no excuse to deny them equal rights under the law. It’s that simple. There is absolutely no validity to bullcrap arguments about “traditional marriage”; those who use such arguments are hiding their bigotry behind a rhetorical flourish.

So what’s next? I’d bet all the money in my bank account (which admittedly isn’t putting a lot on the line) that proponents of basic human rights are going to put an initiative on the 2010 ballot in CA. I will support that initiative full-throatedly as my top priority in 2010. It is imperative that anyone who calls him- or herself a Christian stand behind such an initiative and support it (as much as is possible) with his or her money, effort, and (if possible) vote. It is also imperative that every Christian put pressure on his or her own state legislature (or, in the case of us second-class citizens of DC, our city council) to bring equal human rights to his or her own state if it isn’t already one of the few that acknowledges such rights.

This is a blow, but not a fatal one. We who support equal rights will prevail in time. The question is: which side of history will you be on? Will you look back on the ’00s with regret, as supporters of racial segregation look back at the ’60s and ’70s, or will you be able to look back and tell yourself that you stood on the right side of history? That is the question before each of us today. God help us that we make the right choice.

It’s Time to End the Rotating “Take Me Out”

Tuesday, May 26th, 2009

Those who know me know how important I think the seventh-inning stretch is. There are exactly and only two things one does during the seventh-inning stretch: stand, and sing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” with its true lyrics (”root, root, root for the Cubbies”). One time through, with no Baptist half-step-up modulation (I’m looking at you, Dodger Stadium), and sung well (or at least to the best of one’s ability after a few beers ;-) ).

This is one of the main reasons I dislike Bud Selig – he’s instituted this MLB-wide rule, in the wake of 9/11 and an apparent dearth of displays of patriotism at baseball games, that on Sundays and holidays, “God Bless America” should be sung during the stretch. Now not only is “GBA” an insipid song with schmaltzy lyrics that should take its place with “Shine Jesus Shine” on the Banished Songs List, but during the seventh-inning stretch of all times, the Eucharist of the game of baseball, it’s absolutely inexcusable.

Nevertheless, that’s not the purpose of today’s rant. Today’s rant is focused on none other than Mr. T. Now, let’s get a few things straight: Mr. T is, in most things, awesome. He stands as a shining symbol of things like ass-kicking, staying in school, drinking one’s milk, treating one’s mother right, and crappy made-for-Christian-TV movies. But one of the things Mr. T is not… is a singer.

Ever since Harry Caray died (rest in peace, which backwards is “ecaep ni tser”) the Cubs organization has been bringing in anyone with even a tangential relationship to Chicago, or any celebrity they can get their hands on, to lead the seventh-inning stretch that was popularized by Caray – who not only led the stretch well every time he stood up to do it, but was also, from what I’m told, generally rather drunk while doing it. This has led to some famously tragic renditions of baseball’s anthem – most notably that of Ozzy Osbourne:

Now, I’ve been tolerant of the tradition thus far, but this has to end. Just have Ronny Santo do it every time. He’s not that great a singer, but he is a Cub through and through (not to mention he also happens to know all the words). The revolving door just results in things like Mr. T’s rather painful rendition, or Ozzy Osbourne’s comical incomprehensibility. At the very least, there has to be some kind of vetting process, including at least two questions: (1) please recite the lyrics to the chorus of “Take Me Out”, and (2) can you actually carry a tune halfway decently? (I might also add a third question for people like Jeff Gordon: “Do you know where you are?”)